Hold On To Your Friends
by chrissieee
Summary: Nick's life has changed dramatically for the good and the bad. Will Nick turn to his friends for help or will he try and cope on his own?
1. Chapter 1

**Hey all. I've been lurking on here for ages and I've never gotten around to writing my own fanfiction despite having a few ideas. I'm no writing genius but I am studying a module in it at uni so writing on here is good practice.**

This is just a little idea I had. Enjoy...

As he took the lift up to his apartment something didn't feel right. It felt like there was piece of him missing.

The lift stopped and the doors opened. Nick picked up the car seat off the floor and walked to his front door. As he turned the key he sighed. He was scared. He took a deep breath and pushed the door open walking in to the open plan flat. He walked over to the sofa and placed the car seat down in front of him, sitting down he then picked up the baby that was sitting in it.

"I don't know what we do now mate." Nick said in a worried tone. "It wasn't exactly planned to be like this. Your mother…" Nick trailed off. He couldn't even think about her without a wave of emotion taking over. He held back the tears that we forming in his eyes. "Your mother and I were going to give you the perfect life no matter what. But now it just looks like I'm going to be doing that…" The tears came through and Nick could do nothing to stop them. He didn't even know if they were tears of sadness or tears of joy.

Just one short week ago Nick's life was perfect. He had the girl of his dreams and a baby on the way. He never thought that anything would snatch that happiness away. That was until his girlfriend Yvonne died moments after giving birth to their son.

Things didn't really sink in properly for at least two days and Nick decided he needed to be strong for his son. He tried to ignore things and turned off his phone to avoid any contact with anyone, he thought talking was for wimps. Cutting himself from everyone was the only thing he knew. Only he couldn't cut himself from everyone now. He had a son. He'd need some kind of support.

Nick looked down at the baby in his arms. He hadn't even given him a name. He had no time to think about that kind of thing. He had to plan a funeral for the love of his life. It didn't seem long ago he was planning his own funeral but then his best friend Zoe interfered and things changed. Looking down at his baby Nick realised he should probably talk to someone and who else but Zoe.

He took his phone out of his pocket and ignoring all the messages from worried loved ones, dialled a familiar number…

**Hope that wasn't too painful to read. I'm not too sure when I'll update this as I'm busy but I'm sure it won't be too long. :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks everyone for such positive reviews and favourites / follows of this story. I really didn't expect such a positive reaction. Here's chapter two of the story a little earlier than I planned. I felt inspired on the train earlier and this is the result of it. Enjoy.**

There was a knock on the door and Nick instantly knew who it was. Whilst waiting for Zoe he had put his son to bed and had just been left alone. It was strange. Nick's thought were all over the place. He just needed someone to talk to.

He opened the door and Zoe pulled him into a hug before he could even say anything. The tears started pouring down his face. Nick never normally cried in front of anyone but this was Zoe and he didn't care. Zoe was his best friend and the closest person to him right now.

They pulled away silently after a couple of minutes and walked into the lounge area.

"So…" Zoe said awkwardly. "Where's the little one?" Zoe was desperate to make conversation but didn't want to say anything that would upset Nick.

"Asleep." Nick replied quietly.

"Right…" Zoe really didn't have any idea what to say to Nick. She knew him so well but she'd never been in this sort of situation with him or anyone else. A few silent moments passed.

"So, what's this nursery look like that you were banging on about the other day." Zoe aked out of the blue making Nick jump slightly.

"Through here." Nick said quietly walking towards what was the spare room.

Zoe followed him silently into the room and had a look around.

"It's good.' She commented. "Better than the state it was in when I was last around here." She laughed a little bit which made Nick smile.

"Yeah well Yvonne…" Nick trailed off. The smile on his face disappearing.

"You can say her name, you know." Zoe reassured him.

"Yeah well she made me clear all my stuff out. Do you fancy a drink? I'm sure I've got some wine in the kitchen." And before Zoe could answer Nick had walked off to the kitchen. Zoe tutted at Nick for changing the subject but followed him into the kitchen all the same.

"So, what's his name?" Zoe asked as she perched herself on a stall at the breakfast bar.

"He hasn't got one." Nick grunted.

"Oh. Are you going to give him a name?" Zoe asked concerned.

"Well of course I am." Nick replied getting annoyed. "I haven't had time to think about that. I've had other things on my mind… a funeral."

"Oh yeah…" Zoe had no idea what to say to that. Yvonne's family had emigrated a few years ago and practically cut her out of their lives so all the funeral arrangements were down to Nick.

A few more silent minutes passed.

"There was a great doctor at my med school." Nick said out of the blue. "Dr Alexander Yorke. He told me that when someone dies they can still live on in your heart. Me being me, I sarcastically told him 'the heart is only a pump.' But he was right you know…"

Zoe smiled but still didn't know what to say. She was just about to make some more small talk when Nick started again.

"I'm going to name him Alex. After Dr Yorke." Nick smiled. "Such a great man…"

"And it's such a nice name." Zoe said smiling. "Look, I should get going but you look like you need some time off. I'll look after the ED for you. I did it before when you went away, remember? I can do it again."

"No I'm fine."

"Nick, you need time off." Zoe said sternly. "You've lost your girlfriend and you now have a son. You're life has changed. You need time off to adjust."

"No I don't. I'm fine. Promise. I'll see you tomorrow." Nick walked over to the front door and held it open for her. She gave him a hug on the way out. "Thank you." He whispered in her ear .

Zoe left and Nick was left alone again. He wasn't fine but he felt he had to put on a brave face to the world.

**Hope you all liked it. That chapter was quite dialogue-y and I'm not too good a writing dialogue but yeah. What's Nick going to do? I don't even know yet. :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks again for all your wonderful reviews and follows / favourites. I felt really inspired after getting a return date for Nick so I wrote this. It's more of a filler chapter but still a chapter all the same. I hope you enjoy it. :)**

Nick pulled up in his usual parking space the next morning. Turning the engine off he caught a glimpse of himself in the rear view mirror. He pulled it down to get a better look. He looked tired and old. The night had been long, Alex had woken up several times in the night and when Nick finally did get time to sleep he found the only thing he could think about was Yvonne. Getting out of the car Nick opened the back door to get out his brief case and the baby carrier with little Alex in it. Nick never thought to get a baby sitter for the day. His mind was still all over the place and he just wanted to get out of the house.

Nick walked into the ED reception to be greeted by the expected coos.

"Ooh is this the little one?" Grinned Tess walking over to Nick "And Nick…I'm so sorry…"

"It's okay." Nick tried to sound confident by cutting her off, even though he really wasn't. He managed to walk over to the reception where Zoe was stood. She smiled at him.

"Hey." Zoe said quietly. "What's he doing here?" She gestured towards Alex.

"I couldn't get a baby sitter." Nick replied. "Look, it seems like it's quiet here right now. I'm going to have an office day today. Could you look after here for me?"

"Well, yes of course. Are you sure you even want to be here?" Zoe asked concerned.

Nick gave a small smile.

"Not really." He sighed. "I just can't stand being back at the flat. Everything, it just… it just reminds me of her."

"Okay then." Zoe was still unsure what to say around Nick. She knew how much Yvonne meant to him and she didn't want to say the wrong thing.

Nick walked into his office and shut the door. He put Alex, who was now fast asleep, on the floor next to his desk and sat down. He didn't know what to do. He had a huge pile of work, a funeral to plan and a baby to look after. Right now everything just seemed impossible. He shifted some papers about the desk with the intention of finding some interesting, but nothing interested him. Medicine was his passion in life but he's just found himself not caring for it anymore. He didn't care about anything.

Holding his head in his hands thoughts of Yvonne came flooding through. He thought about the good times they shared together, the little petty arguments and then the end. That was the most upsetting thought he had. He tried to block it out and right on cue Alex started crying instantly stopping Nick's thoughts.

He picked the baby up to comfort him but he carried on crying. Nick had no idea what to do, he was completely out of his comfort zone. Sure, he handled babies at work all the time but he'd give them back to their mothers after a couple of minutes. Alex didn't need changing and he didn't need feeding yet he continued to cry and Nick couldn't work out what was wrong. Nick looked up and clocked Zoe walking past the office window. He ran over to the door and opened it.

"Zoe!" Nick shouted.

Zoe turned around to face him.

"What's up? I've got a patient to see to." Zoe was clearly busy but Nick needed her help.

"I need your help. I know you're not the most maternal person in the world but I can't get him to shut up."

"I can tell." Zoe walked into the office and took Alex off of Nick holding him close to her. Alex instantly stopped cry.

"How do you do that?" Nick asked in amazement.

"He's a baby. He just needs some love." Zoe went over and sat down on the sofa Nick conveniently had in his office. "Look I've got to go and get this patient sorted. When I'm done you're going home to bond with your son."

Nick smiled slightly then sighed.

"I can't. Every time I look at him. He just reminds me so much of her." Nick had to hold back the tears he could feel forming.

Zoe walked up to Nick and held out Alex for him to take.

"I know sweet heart. It's going to be hard but you can do it." She smiled as Nick took Alex before walking out of the office.

Nick looked down at Alex. "Looks like Daddy's going to have to sort his life out, eh."


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks again for all the reviews and follows / favourites they're really appreciated. I really didn't expect to write as much as I have done over the past couple of days but I've been on holiday so that's probably why. This chapter was really long so I've sort of cut it in two and now it's really short so sorry about that. I'll upload the next part either tonight or tomorrow. **

The day that Nick had been dreading had arrived. It was the day of Yvonne's funeral. He didn't feel ready to say goodbye. He'd spent the last four days off work attempting to bond with his young son whilst also trying to rid his flat of anything that would remind him of Yvonne. He couldn't cope with all the constant reminders of what he had, and what he had lost.

Nick woke up early that morning. He hated these cold winter mornings; they made him feel even more alone. He'd often find himself at night dreaming that Yvonne was there next to him, but when he woke up the harsh reality would hit him.

He got up and opened the curtains, not that they did much. It was still pitch black outside but Nick knew he had to get up and prepare himself for the long day ahead. Walking into Alex's room he watched as his son slept peacefully completely unaware of what today held. Nick left him sleeping and made a coffee. It felt strange for him only making one cup of coffee. Normally he'd make a second with a tonne of sugar in. He hated that Yvonne consumed so much sugar but he also secretly loved it. It was just one of the many things he loved about her. He smiled at the thought of Yvonne and her little habits. Maybe today was the day that he could start moving on. The grieving process would stop and he would begin to look to the future. A future where he could tell his son all the good thing about his mother without breaking down into tears.

Nick went to his room to get dressed and it wasn't look before Alex alerted him that he had woken up. Once Nick had attended to Alex's needs he had time to sit down and have his coffee. It had gone cold but that really didn't bother him. Nothing seemed to bother him recently. He'd just finished it when there was a knock at the door. He sighed and walked to the door opening it slowly.

"Hey." Said a young girl cheerfully. "Katie, from Nat's Nannies."

"Oh right, you best come in." Nick said ushering the overly cheerful babysitter in. He'd decided to hire a babysitter from an agency as it was inappropriate for Alex to attend the funeral and he'd be making use of the service a lot more often when he got back to work. "Alex is in his room which is just there." He said pointing towards the room. "You'll find everything you need in there or in the kitchen. Um, help yourself to anything you want. There's DVDs down by the TV so if you get bored you've got something to do, they were my girlfriends…" Nick trailed off.

"Are you okay, Mr Jordan?" Katie asked concerned for him.

"Yeah I'm fine. Look, I best get going. Just do what you need to do for the day. I'll be back at five." And with that Nick grabbed his coat and keys and left.

**I hope that wasn't too depressing for you lot over this festive season. It will get happier, I promise. :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Here's the next part that I promised earlier. It was originally meant to be in the previous chapter but I just didn't think it would fit very well so here it is. **

Nick stood by Yvonne's grave side in silence. He'd been standing there for a little while now just thinking. The service had been short and was attended by only Nick. He didn't expect any of Yvonne's family or friends to turn up. They were all far too busy and would be remembering her in their own ways. Nick didn't believe in God but he couldn't help but feel blessed. Blessed for the two years that he'd spent with Yvonne and blessed with a child. Something he never thought he'd have.

He took a deep breath of the cold air before sighing. He had to move on. For the sake of his son and for himself. He hadn't eaten for days and he knew how unhealthy that was. He suddenly felt a presence and turned around only to see Zoe stood behind him.

"Hey." She smiled slightly walking towards him. "I thought you might like some company."

He smiled and silently held out his hand for her to take. She moved next to him saying nothing and took his hand. The two of them stood there in silence for a few minutes thinking about Yvonne.

"I feel ready now." He said breaking the silence causing Zoe to jump slightly. "I feel ready to move on with my life. I feel like I can get back to work and start looking towards the future with Alex."

"That's good." Zoe said. "It will be hard you know. But if you're the Nick Jordan I know, you'll do just fine."

Nick smiled at her.

"Come on; let's get you something to eat." She continued. "You look like you haven't eaten for days."

"I haven't." Nick grumbled. "Nothing seems appealing."

"Not even a hotdog from the van down the road?" Zoe asked.

"Well, I think I can make an exception for one of them." He smiled.

Nick and Zoe walked hand in hand out of the cemetery and down the road to the car park where the burger van stood. Nick sat down at the bench whilst Zoe got the food. He loved Zoe but the days of them being in a relationship were well and truly over. He loved her as a friend and that was all. He'd moved on, he'd had a relationship with Yvonne and now he was the father to her child. He was deep in thought until he heard Zoe's footsteps approaching behind him.

"Onions and mustard." Zoe said holding out a hotdog to him which he took gratefully and took a bite of.

"You remembered." He laughed still with food in his mouth.

"How could I ever forget?" Zoe liked having this Nick back. But she knew he was still fragile and she'd have to tread carefully for a little while more. "It's nice to see you smiling."

"Well it's either that or I cry." He admitted. "I just feel like these past two weeks have been a dream and she hasn't really gone. But today, saying goodbye. It felt final. It felt real. It was real. And this hotdog is real and it tastes pretty good." He said taking another bite.

"So are you coming back to work soon?" Zoe asked hoping that she could keep Nick's chirpy mood up.

"Of course." Nick said authoritatively. "I wouldn't want to deny Holby ED of its clinical lead for much longer. I've sorted it so I'll be back in tomorrow."

"Really?" Zoe said relieved.

"Yep, I've got the baby sitter sorted and my mind seems to be getting back on track so why not?" Nick took the final bite of his hotdog. "Do you want a lift home?"

Zoe nodded and they walked back to Nick's car hand in hand again.

**So is Nick really feeling better? Who knows...**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey all. I had another boring train journey today and this is the result of it. As I always say thanks for the reviews / faves / follows. I really do appreciate them all. This will be my last update until after Christmas, so I hope you all have lovely Christmases. I've made it a bit longer than usual especially. ;) Enjoy. :)**

Nick's first day back at work since Yvonne's funeral was going well. Zoe had pre-warned the other members of staff to give Nick no sympathy as it wasn't what he'd want. Nick had managed to keep himself fairly busy spending the day in cubicles to get back into the swing of things slowly.

Nick had about an hour of his shift left when he decided that he'd go and do some work in his office whilst the ED was fairly calm. He placed his phone on his desk and pressed the 'home' button so the picture of Alex that he was using as a wallpaper flashed up. He smiled at the thought of seeing his son in just under an hour. He was just getting into his work when there was a knock on the door.

"Come in." Nick shouted.

Tom opened the door.

"Dr Kent, what can I do for you?" Nick enquired.

"Promise not to shoot the messenger." Tom said worried.

Nick didn't answer. He just gave Tom a look indicating him to carry on.

"It's Alex… Katie brought him in. Don't flip out…"

Before Tom could finish Nick was up on his feet.

"Where is he?" Nick asked demandingly.

"Cubicle two. But he's okay…" Nick pushed Tom out the way as he headed over to cubicles. Tom rolled his eyes as he went to follow after Nick.

Nick walked over to the cubicle and quickly pulled open the curtain to reveal Katie holding Alex.

"Give him here." Nick demanded putting his arms out to take Alex.

"Mr Jordan, I…" Katie started.

"Give." Nick commanded not giving her the chance to explain. Katie handed Alex over.

"I… just…" She continued.

"You just what?" Nick snapped.

"I thought there was something up. He was crying. So I brought him here."

"Babies cry sometimes." Nick said angrily. "That doesn't mean you have to bring him here and waste everybody's time."

Tom approached the cubicle slowly behind Nick.

"It's okay, Mr Jordan." Tom said reassuringly. "She was just being careful. And at the end of the day everything's okay."

"No it's not." Nick snapped back. "It's not okay that she should get me worried for no reason! I have enough on my plate to deal with as it is!"

"Mr Jordan, I am so sorry." Katie said tears beginning to form in her eyes. "This is just my first job and I didn't want to mess up."

"Well you have messed up." Nick shouted angrily. By now he was causing a scene and Zoe walked over and stood with Tom. "Don't bother coming back tomorrow. I'll find another babysitter. One that can babysit."

"But Mr Jordan, I need this job…" Katie protested.

"I don't care." Nick was fed up and stormed back to his office with Alex in his arms.

Once there he put Alex down in his baby seat and sat down in his chair holding his head in his hands. Zoe walked into the office closing the door behind her.

"Well, there were better ways you could have handled that." Zoe said calmly. Nick didn't reply. "Did you really think kicking up a fuss would make things better? She's just a kid you know."

"I don't care." Came Nick's muffled reply as he still had his head in his hands.

"Nick, I know you're not coping."

"I'm coping fine."

"You're not. Look at me." Demanded Zoe. "Look at me Nick."

Nick didn't budge but Zoe wasn't going to give up. Nick knew that Zoe would sit and wait until he did what she said. He finally lifted his head up to reveal his face streaked with tears.

"Oh, darling." Zoe whispered as she walked over to Nick and sat on the edge of his desk. She put her arms around him and he returned the hug. The tears came thick and fast as Nick cried into Zoe's chest.

"I can't do it Zo..." Nick said between tears. "I thought I could but I can't..."

"You can." Zoe said rubbing her hand up and down Nick's back comforting him. "These things take time. You were doing so well today."

The pair of them sat in silence for a good couple of minutes when Nick finally broke the silence.

"I'm going to call it a day I think." He said wiping away his tears. "I just want to go home."

"Fine." Zoe said. "But I don't want you to be alone. You'll go mad at this rate, you need some adult company. I finish here in an hour. I'll come around yours with a takeaway, yeah?"

"That'll be great." Nick smiled weakly as he got up to get ready to leave.

Nick liked the idea of having Zoe's company for the evening but he was still worried about the future. If he couldn't cope alone now, how was he going to cope in the long term?


	7. Chapter 7

**Here's the next part. I hope you all had lovely Christmases. This part I wrote a little hungover and I'm not too happy with it but it's the best it will get so enjoy...**

Nick got back to his flat and opened the door. Stepping in he went through his usual routine of chucking his keys down and kicking his shoes off in the door way. Yvonne had always hated him leaving his shoes at the door but since she had gone there was no-one to nag at him so he soon got back into the habit.

It was getting late and Nick could see Alex was tired. He put him to bed and went and collapsed on the sofa in front of the TV. He didn't put it on; he just sat starring at the blank screen. Nothing on TV interested him anymore, not even the news. The hour wait for Zoe to arrive dragged on but there was soon the expected knock at the door.

Nick jumped up and rushed to the door opening it quickly.

"Ooh, you're keen." Zoe said as she jumped not expecting the door to be opened quite as quickly as it was.

"Yeah." Nick laughed slightly. "Come in, I'll get some plates and there's wine on the coffee table."

Nick went off to the kitchen whilst Zoe put the food on the coffee table and sat herself on the sofa. She picked up the bottle of wine that Nick had put on the table earlier and poured herself a glass. Nick came back into the room with the plates and put them down.

"So what did you get?" Nick said excitedly.

"Only a Chinese." Zoe replied.

"My favourite… along with hotdogs." Nick gave Zoe a quick wink and started putting the food on his plate.

"So how have you been since earlier?" Zoe asked not sure whether she should bring it up.

Nick sighed before answering. "Yeah. I'm okay… It's just little things really seem to be getting to me. Maybe I was trying to move on too soon." He sighed again. "My life has just changed so much in such a short space of time. One minute I have a girlfriend and a son and I'm the happiest man alive, then it was just snatched away from me. I know I've been a bit of a dick in the past but I'm not sure I deserved this." Nick poured himself some wine and took a mouthful. "I see this kind of thing happen every day in the ED and I just never thought something like that could happen to me…" He trailed off.

"It was never going to be easy." Zoe said. "I keep trying to tell you. But you can do it Nick. You're the strongest man I know."

Nick smiled and the pair of them sat in silence eating for a couple of minutes.

"I'll try again tomorrow." Nick said confidently. "I'll find another babysitter and just try again. It's all I can do." He shrugged.

Zoe smiled at Nick. The pair of them found themselves looking directly into each others eye and before they knew it they were slowly moving in for a kiss… until the sounds of Alex's cries from the bedroom brought them back into the real world.

"I'll go see to him." Nick said quickly and hurrying off to Alex's room. Zoe poured herself another glass of wine and downed it, slightly confused as to what had happened between her and Nick.

"He just needed changing." Nick said walking back in the room. "Now where were we?"

"Oh, I think we were just talking about things." Zoe replied not sure what to say. "Work, I think."

"Oh right yeah, so tomorrow will be another day…"

**Again, thanks for all the faves/follows/reviews whatever. :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey all. As usual thanks for all the feedback on this story. It really does motivate me to write this. I was also motivated by seeing the 'Love Drama' advert on BBC1. Nick and Zoe holding hands was just so sweet and if you haven't seen it just keep your eyes peeled in between TV shows. It's a bit of a blink and you miss it moment. Anyway, here is the next part of the story. Enjoy. :)**

Nick awoke on the sofa to the sounds of a DVD menu and the feeling of a dead arm. He looked down and noticed Zoe curled up asleep with her head resting on his arm. He looked at his watch to see only a couple of hours had passed since he suggested they watched a film, which clearly neither of them did watch in the end. Nick thought about what had happened before then, and before Alex started crying. What would have happened if Alex didn't start crying? Would they have actually kissed? Nick moved his arm and Zoe started to wake up.

"Bloody hell, Zo." Nick remarked. "I can't feel my arm."

"Do you want a doctor to look at it?" Zoe joked still half asleep. "What time is it?"

"Only nine-ish" Nick replied straightening himself out a bit.

"Oh right." Zoe yawned and sat up. "Nick, can I ask you something?"

"Um, yeah." Nick said unsure. He had no idea what Zoe was going to ask. He was slightly worried he was going to ask about earlier when he didn't even know what had really gone on.

"Were we… were we going to kiss earlier?"

Nick thought for a few seconds. This was exactly the question he feared she would ask and he had no idea how to respond.

"I don't know." Nick said honestly. "I was going to ask you the same."

"Oh okay…" Zoe trailed off in thought.

"My turn to ask a question." Nick said out of the blue. "What would you have done if we did kiss?"

"I would have freaked out a little bit." Zoe let out a little laugh. "But only because I've wanted it for so long." She sighed.

Nick looked at Zoe in disbelief.

"Really?" He asked surprised.

"Really." She confirmed. "But there was never a right time tell you how I felt. You were always so happy with Yvonne. I'd never seen you so happy, and I like seeing you happy. Then Yvonne fell pregnant and I thought that was it. My chance was gone for good. Then when Yvonne passed away… I just thought I'd be taking advantage of a bad situation if I ever told you how I felt now."

Nick looked at Zoe with sadness in his eyes.

"I've said too much." Zoe said sadly. "I should get going."

Zoe went to stand up but Nick put his hand on her knee to stop her.

"Stay, please." Nick demanded. He swallowed hard before starting again. "When Yvonne died, it honestly felt like a part of me died. I felt so alone. I felt so scared. That's why I phoned you the night I brought Alex home. You were the first person that came to my mind. I could have phoned Charlie or someone but I didn't. I phoned you, because you're always on my mind… because I love you."

"Nick it's too soon." Zoe said tears appearing in her eyes.

"It's not." Nick said the tears appearing in his eyes too. "It's really not. Yvonne would have wanted to see me happy and when I'm with you I am."

"I just… I just don't know."

Nick had no idea what to say. This was a difficult situation for the both of them to be in. Zoe was obviously worried about taking advantage of Nick whilst he was so fragile, but they both wanted each other. Nick was known for sometimes being spontaneous in his work and he decided to be spontaneous in this situation.

He grabbed Zoe's waste and pulled her in for a passionate kiss making her gasp slightly. She responded and after about a minute the pair of them separated.

"See, it's not too soon, Zo." Nick said his forehead touching hers. "It's really not."

Zoe smiled and nodded her head. Nick got up and held out his hand for Zoe to take. She took it and he led her to the bedroom…

**Wasn't that sweet? I didn't actually intend on the story going down this route but it just seemed to naturally flow that way.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks again for all the wonderful feedback on this story. I thought you might all like the last chapter. I felt mean not getting them together sooner.  
To the guest who asked where the picture is from, it's from the 'Love Drama' advert on BBC1 which is about on youtube or you can catch it in between TV shows on BBC1. I'm guessing it's from the episode going out on the 12th January. **  
**Here's the next part, which again is the product of a boring train journey. I hope you like it. :)**

Nick's second day back at work had been a hard one. He'd woken up in such a good mood with Zoe by his side. Zoe had managed to persuade her mum to look after Alex for the day and they'd avoided awkward questions when they walked into work together. Everything was going fine until a case very similar to Yvonne's came in. Zoe had offered to take over but Nick was adamant he was going to see it through to the end. Nick had to tell a distraught husband that his wife was going upstairs for surgery, shortly after giving birth in the ED.

"I'm really sorry Mr Black." Nick said sympathetically. "We've done all we can down here, your wife is being moved to somewhere more appropriate."

The young man Nick was talking to looked down at the floor, obviously thinking.

"What am I going to do?" He sighed, finally looking up with tears in his eyes. "She's my everything."

"Well, try not to focus on the bad things. They'll be doing everything they can for her." Nick saw the sadness on the man's face. "If it's any consolation I went through a similar thing myself recently. I know how distressing it can be." Nick gave a small smile. "Think about the positives, the child you've been given."

"Thanks Doc." The man nodded and walked out leaving Nick standing alone.

Nick knew he'd get similar cases, he saw them all the time. He just didn't expect one so soon. He walked slowly back to his office. He'd just got in when Zoe barged in with two coffees.

"Knock, knock." She said with a smile on her face placing the coffees down on his desk. She saw Nick flicking through some files in his filing cabinet. "Hey, are you okay?"

Nick turned around to face her.

"Yeah I'm alright." He said and gave her a small smile. "Just in my own world."

Zoe walked over so she was standing in front of Nick.

"You handled that case really well today. She smiled and gave Nick a quick kiss. "I'm proud of you."

Nick put his arms around Zoe's waste and pulled her in for a hug. He couldn't help but plaster a grin across his face. The pair of them stood there for a while until there was a quick knock on the door and Charlie popped his head around, causing Nick and Zoe to quickly separate.

"Oh, sorry." Charlie said embarrassed. "I'm not interrupting anything am I?"

"Not at all." Zoe said grabbing her coffee and walking out, turning to give Nick a quick wink causing him to grin.

Charlie stepped further into the office as Nick sat down at his desk, and gestured for Charlie to take a seat too.

"There is something going on between you two, isn't there?" Charlie asked.

"Maybe." Nick said beaming. "What did you come in here for anyway?"

"Well I wanted to see how you were after that case today. It was a tough one."

"I'm fine." Nick sighed. "I've got Zoe…" He trailed off.

"You sound unsure."

"You don't think I'm moving on too soon, do you?" Nick asked. He knew he could confide in Charlie. The two of them hadn't always seen seen eye to eye in the past but ever since Charlie helped him get through his brain tumour he saw him as a great friend.

"Of course not." Charlie said confidently. "Everybody's different. If you feel it's right, then it's right. No-one can tell you how you feel."

Nick just looked unsure.

"Look…" Charlie continued. "If you want my honest opinion, I think you and Zoe are great together. She's obviously doing you some good. If that case came in yesterday you wouldn't have been able to do it. But look at you today; you were back to the old Nick Jordan everyone in this ED knows."

Nick smiled gratefully at Charlie.

"I guess so. Thanks Charlie."

"No problem." Charlie said getting up. "I best get going. See you around."

"Yeah see you." Nick said as Charlie left closing the door.

Nick felt his phone go off in his pocket and took it out. He smiled as he saw a message from Zoe.

"_Mum said she'd look after Alex all night if that's okay with you. The Vine later? Xx"_

Nick smiled at the thought of spending some alone time with Zoe. He text her back instantly.

_"That's fine. Meet you there at 8? Xx" _

He put his phone away and started working on his computer. Things were starting to get better.

**Hope that was alright for you. I felt like adding a Nick and Charlie chapter because I quite like their friendship.  
Also if you're unsure what The Vine is, it's a wine bar Zoe mentioned in series 26. I remember stupid little things like that. **


	10. Chapter 10

**Here's another part of the story. I can't believe it's chapter 10 already, I originally only planned on making this a 10 chapter fic but it's turned out completely different than how I planned, and there's still lots more to come.  
Again thanks for all the feedback, it really does mean a lot and I probably wouldn't have the motivation to keep writing without it. **  
**I'm not entirely happy with this chapter but I've written and re-written it so many times I think this is as good as it will get. I hope you all like it. :)**

It was 7:45 and Nick was just getting ready to leave the ED to go and meet Zoe at the wine bar.

With Charlie's words of wisdom still fresh in his mind Nick knew there were things that him and Zoe would have to talk about. The past and the future. Talking about the past was something that particularly worried Nick. He didn't want to re-live the whole baby drama but it would have to be resolved if the pair of them were to have any type of future together.

Nick got to The Vine dead on 8pm to see Zoe waiting outside have a cigarette.

"Bad for you." Nick remarked as he approached her shaking his head.

"Don't start already." Zoe joked. "Besides it was to calm me down. I thought you were going to be late for a minute." She threw the cigarette on the floor and stubbed it out with the heel of her shoe.

"Me? Late? I'm Nick Jordan. I'm never late." He laughed and gave her a quick kiss before opening the door for her.

As Zoe walked by Nick gave her a cheeky pinch on the back side causing her to hit him on the arm.

"Ow." Nick complained playfully. "That is the arm of a top surgeon you're trying to break."

The pair of them walked into the bar and chose a booth to sit in. Zoe picked up a wine list and started reading it.

"You don't need that." Nick said snatching the list off her.

"Whaa…?"

"I'll just get the most expensive." Nick said as Zoe looked on confused. "Red?"

"Yeah, that's fine." Zoe said. "Get two."

"Are you trying to get me drunk Doctor Hanna?" Nick laughed. "You don't need to get me drunk if you want me in bed. Just put those glasses of yours on." Nick winked as he left to get the wine.

Zoe sat back smiling. He may not be every girls ideal man but he was the sexy, rich consultant that she had always dreamed of. Zoe got out her phone to see a message from Linda, who apart from Zoe's mum was the only other person to know about this 'date.'

_"Hope he's treating you well and buying. If not there's half a bottle of Labrini in my fridge that needs drinking. If you don't reply I'll just take it that you're having a good time. ;)"_

Zoe laughed as Nick returned with two bottles of wine.

"And what's so funny?" Nick asked curiously.

"Nothing. Just a text from a friend."

"Right." Nick said raising his eyebrows. He had a fairly good idea what the text contained. He poured Zoe and himself some wine and took a sip. "So…" Nick had no idea what to say. He knew he'd have to bring up the topic he'd been dreading but he didn't know how to do it. "I think we need to talk about the past." He blurted out causing Zoe to nearly spit out the wine in her mouth.

"Okay." Zoe sighed. "What do you want to know?"

"It's not like that Zo." Nick said sadly. "I just think we need to clear things up before we think about, well you know, the future."

"Okay then." Zoe started, finishing her glass of wine and pouring another. "I'll start from the top, yeah? All I ever wanted to do was make you happy. Like I said last night, I like seeing you happy. And well, when you said you wanted a baby I thought it would make you happy. How could I deny you that? So, I thought if we tried hard enough it would happen." Zoe sipped a bit more of her drink. "I wanted it so bad Nick. It's just science wasn't exactly on my side." Zoe felt a small tear slip down her face.

Nick leant over to Zoe and wiped the tear away.

"I was hardly a saint." Nick sighed after a few seconds. "I shouldn't have put pressure on you the way I did. We should have talked. If we want this to work again then we are going to have to talk. In all honesty I was partly to blame. I'm not the most fertile man on the planet…"

"What?" Zoe looked up surprised. "You managed to have Alex alright."

"Well… he wasn't an accident." Nick took a deep breath. "It took me and Yvonne a lot of trying. She knew she didn't have long..." He trailed off as he so often did when talking about Yvonne.

Zoe could see Nick was getting upset and wanted to try and change the subject.

"Well, I wouldn't change a thing." Zoe said "I mean to think if things were different we probably wouldn't be agreeing to talk more now and you wouldn't have your little Alex. I don't want to sound cliché, but everything happens for a reason."

"I suppose…" Nick said deep in thought. "Drink up." He poured himself another glass finishing it off. "If you're up for it we can take that other bottle home and have a night in front of the TV together."

"What so we can just fall asleep again?" Zoe replied sarcastically.

"I don't think there'll be much sleeping tonight." Nick grinned.

**I thought I'd do a chapter where Nick and Zoe cleared up the past. It always winds me up how it's just sort of been left on the show.  
Also, if you're wondering about Nick's fertility it was mentioned in Holby many many many moons ago that he had a low sperm count. Again, it was just something the writers didn't want to pick up on and conveniently 'forgot.'**


	11. Chapter 11

**So here is the last part of the story for 2012. I'm going to warn you now, there's only going to be about four more chapters of this story. But don't worry because I do have a sequel planned.  
As usual thanks for all the feedback, it's always appreciated.  
This story will also contain Dylan because I like him and I'm sad he left the series. Also, this chapter contains a medical bit and I'm not too good at that so any mistakes on that front are my own and I apologise for them in advance.**

Nick had been rushed off his feet most of the morning. He had to wake Zoe up for her early shift, go and pick Alex up from Zoe's mum and then drop him off at the crèche. He'd just had time to grab a coffee before he headed off to work.

Nick pulled up in his usual parking space and headed off into work as normal. Everything seemed normal until he walked through the doors.

"CONGRATULATIONS" Noel and Big Mac shouted.

"You what?" Nick asked confused.

"Well you … and er… Doctor Hanna…" Mac tried to explain in his usual not very discreet way, before walking off sheepishly with Noel.

Nick sighed as he saw Zoe rushing up to him.

"Nick, I am so sorry." Zoe apologised. "I was talking to Linda in the staff room about me and you and I guess Big Mac overheard. I'm so sorry."

"Hey, don't worry." Nick said putting his arm around her and walking over to the staff room. "They were going to find out anyway."

"Find out what?" asked Tess who was busy making a coffee. This caught the attention of all the other members of staff on their breaks.

Nick took a deep breath before speaking. He had no idea how the other members of staff who didn't know were going to take this news. It had been a big shock even for himself. He didn't expect to find himself in a relationship so soon after Yvonne.

"Well, as you all know. I lost my Yvonne just under a month ago. Things haven't been easy but I've had my best friend by my side." Nick looked at Zoe and smiled. "And well… we're together."

The entire staff room went quiet with everyone looking at Nick and Zoe. Nick wasn't sure if they were shocked or happy or what.

"If you're all wondering why I've moved on so quick, all I can say is it wasn't intentional." Nick continued. "I will always love Yvonne. But she would have wanted me to be happy and with Zoe I am happy. That's all. Now come on, back to work."

Everyone left the staff room minus Tess who was still on her break and Nick who needed a moment after his announcement.

"Well congratulations." Tess said cheerfully.

"Thanks." Nick replied simply, before leaving.

As Nick was walking out of the staff room Jeff and Dixie came rushing in with a patient.

"This is Diana Rippon, 67… involved in the RTC… minor head injuries… possible fractured wrist…" Dixie shouted during the handover leading the way into resus.

Nick followed and stood still in thought as the name hit him.

"Mr Jordan…" Dixie said. "Mr Jordan, where do you want her?"

"Oh, um… over there." Nick said pointing over to bay two snapping himself out of his thoughts.  
Yvonne didn't talk about her family much. All Nick knew was that they'd emigrated and she was too focused on her career to go. She'd been estranged from them for nearly twenty years. Nick knew she had a brother because that's who he tried to call to break the news of her death to. Diana was a name he had heard mentioned though...

Nick walked over to Diana in his authoritative clinical lead mode.

"Hi there, Diana." He said slightly wary. "I'm… Mr Jordan and you're in Holby City ED."

"Mr Jordan…" Diana said weakly. "Are you the Mr Jordan?"

"Sorry?" Nick asked unsure what she meant, examining her.

"The Mr Jordan who was with my Yvonne." She clarified. "My son, Xavier, had an answer phone message from you… when she died."

Nick sighed.

"Yes, that's me." He said sadly. "Look, it's nothing personal but I'm going to get another doctor to treat you. It just doesn't feel right." He admitted, paging Dylan.

Dylan walked into resus almost immediately.

"What have we got here then Mr Jordan?" Dylan asked.

"Right, Dr Keogh. This is Diana. She was involved in the RTC by the Travis Roundabout. Minor head injuries. I'd also get that wrist x-rayed and a CT scan to be safe." Nick said walking towards the door.

"Okay then." Dylan said getting on with it. "And congratulations on your new relationship status."

"What?" Nick asked stopping and turning around quickly.

"Sam told me." Dylan replied. "You and Zoe are together right?"

Nick looked blank before catching Diana's angry expression.

"Just get her booked in." Nick said before walking off.

Nick knew his relationship with Zoe was going too smoothly. He'd always got the idea from Yvonne when she rarely did talk about her family that Diana wasn't a very nice person and she wasn't going to leave without questions. Which also raised the question what was she doing in Holby anyway?

**Not my best chapter. Sorry. But I thought I'd add some conflict. **

**I hope you all have wonderful New Years!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Hi everyone. I am so sorry for the delay in this chapter. Basically, I am living the most hectic few months of my life. I've got all my final deadlines and applying for work experience and other things. So yeah. Sorry about that!  
I hope you all had lovely new years and if you didn't - Things can only get better!**

**As usual - all the feedback on this has been amazing and it really motivates me so thanks.**

**This chapter isn't my favourite. I had a bit of writers block like I knew what I wanted to write but didn't know how to. But this is what I ended up with so I hope you enjoy. :)**

"What am I going to do?" Nick asked Zoe as he paced up and down his office. Zoe just sat back in his chair and rolled her eyes. "Zoe, are you listening? What am I going to do?" He asked again.

"Do about what?" Zoe asked confused.

"What am I going to do about Diana?" Nick asked getting stressed. "Oh… You haven't been listening to a single word I've said…"

"I have." Zoe exclaimed. "You just treat her and send her off again like any other patient."

"And what about Alex?"

"Well it's clear she wanted nothing to do with him. That son of hers never replied to your answer phone message."

"I never mentioned Alex..." Nick sighed.

"What?" Zoe asked shocked. "Why not?"

"I had my mind on other things. Yvonne had just died giving birth. I hated that baby." Nick admitted. "It's so stupid. I just… I just wanted someone to blame and I blamed him."

"Why didn't you say anything?" Zoe asked getting up and walking over to Nick.

"It just didn't seem right." Nick shrugged. "And besides, I've realised no-one was to blame, I was just being stupid."

Zoe put her arms around Nick before there was a knock on the door and they seperated.

"Come in." Nick shouted.

Dylan walked through the door with a tablet in his hands.

"Um, I think you should look at these test results." Dylan said handing Nick the tablet. Nick examined the results and looked up at Dylan concerned. "Who's going to tell her?" Dylan asked.

"Well you're her doctor." Nick said sternly.

"Nick." Zoe interjected. "I really think you should. You also have something else you need to tell her, don't you."

Nick didn't want to tell Diana any of the news. But he realised that informing her about a grandchild may soften the blow of the results showed.

"Fine." Nick said. "I'll take over this case now Dr Keogh."

"Oh great." Dylan muttered walking out of the office.

"Right..." Nick started walking out of the office. "I could do with a little bit of help." He looked at Zoe pleadingly.

"Fine."

The pair of them walked to resus where Diana was being looked after by one of the nurses.

"Thanks Wayne." Zoe said to the nurse. "We'll take it from here."

Wayne walked off leaving Zoe and Nick alone with Diana. Nick swallowed hard before talking.

"There's something you should know…" Nick started, looking down at the tablet. Diana rolled her eyes.

"If it's what I think you're going to tell me, I know." Diana said. "I'm dying. I know."

"Right." Nick looked over to Zoe for re-assurance. "Well in that case… there's something else you should know…"

"If it's about your new bird I don't want to know." Diana snapped. She looked over at Zoe clocking her name badge. "Is that her? Bit of a downgrade…" She mumbled.

Zoe tutted but didn't react. She didn't want to upset anyone. Nick was about to tell Diana some more news that was sure to be a shock.

"No." Nick let out a small smile. "There's something else. Something I didn't mention before about Yvonne… She… We had a child. A son."

"What?..." Diana was clearly lost for words.

"When Yvonne died, she'd just given birth to Alex." Nick took a deep breath. "It never really sunk in that I had a son when I left that voicemail…"

Zoe smiled at Nick giving him the confidence he so needed.

"Alex." Diana said. "That's such a lovely name. Maybe I could meet Alex?" Diana asked Nick, her tone calmer from how it was previously.

"Of course." Nick said. "I could arrange to bring him here for tomorrow, if that's okay.

Diana smiled before sighing.

"I only came here to see Yvonne's resting place." She looked up at Nick. "I was on my way there when the crash happened. I just wanted to say a final goodbye." A small tear slipped down her face.

Nick turned to look at Zoe.

"Zoe, get my coat and car keys." He ordered.

"Why? What are you doing?" Zoe asked as she had no idea what Nick was up to.

"We are going to make sure Diana's wishes are fulfilled. It's only fair." Nick said to Zoe. "If that's okay with you?" He turned to Diana.

Diana nodded and smiled at Nick.

"Thank you." She whispered.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey all. Here's the next part. I feel slightly guilty for making everyone wait so long for the last part so I thought I'd write this this morning.  
I always say it but thanks for the reviews. I really do appreciate them!  
This story does have some medical bits in, although I've tried to skim over them as much as I can, any mistakes are my own. **

Nick pulled up in the car park at the cemetery with Diana on board. He'd given Zoe instructions to go and pick Alex up and take him back to the hospital.

Nick wheeled Diana through the cemetery slowly. She was too weak to walk by herself. When they finally got to the spot of Yvonne's grave, he stopped.

"She liked it here." Nick said breaking the silence. "We used to come for walks up here. She knew she didn't have long, so she sort of hinted about being buried here."

Diana thought for a moment. It was a lot to take in. The daughter that she had been estranged from for so many years had died and they'd never made peace.

"I knew she was ill." Diana sighed. "I was just so angry. I couldn't believe she'd choose a career over her own family. I just…I should have visited sooner."

Nick smiled and walked over to re-arrange some of the flowers on the grave that had become out of place.

"I'm so glad she made it to superintendent." Diana continued. "It was her dream to make it up the ranks."

"That was when I first met her." Nick said to Diana. "She'd just been promoted. She was amazing. A strong and spirited woman with a good career. She just seemed too good to be true at times. Yeah, we didn't always see eye to eye at work but as soon as we got home it was perfect." Nick paused. "I honestly thought I was going to lose her at the riots. I thought it was the end. But I got an extra year with her, and a son. Our lives seemed so perfect. Then she was gone…" Nick trailed off as a single tear slipped down his face.

"You really loved her, didn't you?" Enquired Diana.

"Yeah." Nick replied simply, trying to control the tears he could feel appearing in his eyes.

"And Zoe?"

"She's helped me so much." Nick sighed. "Without Zoe, I probably wouldn't have done it. I've never been one to give up, but when Yvonne went. I wanted to go with her…"

Diana looked over to Yvonne's grave deep in thought.

"If there's anything Yvonne would have wanted, it would have been for you to be happy." She smiled over at Nick. "I think she'd approve of your new relationship."

"Thank you." Nick said quietly.

Suddenly Diana fell onto the floor in pain.

"Diana!" Nick rushed over to her. "Diana, can you hear me?!" Nick started checking over Diana and rung for an ambulance.

* * *

Diana was in resus after being rushed in by Nick. Zoe walked in and walked over to Diana.

"Diana, I really don't know what to say. But I'm afraid…" Zoe started

"This is the end, isn't it?" Diana asked cutting Zoe off.

Zoe nodded her head to confirm Diana thoughts.

"Is there anyone you'd like us to call for you?" Zoe asked sympathetically.

"No." Diana shook her head. "You could ring my son but he isn't in the country at the moment."

"We'll give it a go." Zoe said trying to re-assure Diana. "Just before I go though, there is someone you should meet."

Zoe looked over to the resus doors where Nick was stood outside with Alex in his arms. She signalled for Nick to come in. Nick walked over to Diana with Alex.

"Diana, this is your grandson." Nick passed the baby over to her.

Diana held Alex in her arms and smiled like any other proud grandmother would.

"He's beautiful." Diana said trying to hold back the tears of joy. "He's really beautiful. Thank you Nick. Thank you so much for giving me this chance." She said handing Alex back.

Suddenly, the machines around Diana started going off as she went into arrest.

"Zoe!" Nick shouted. "Don't just stand there!"

"She's 'do not resuscitate' Nick. There's nothing we can do." Zoe put a re-assuring arm around Nick's waste. "She's gone."

**I hope this part wasn't too depressing!**


	14. Chapter 14

**So here it is... the penultimate chapter of this story. A nice bit of Nick and Zoe for ya. Sorry it's taken a while.  
As usual thanks for all the feedback. I really appreciate it.** **Not much to say about this chapter apart from obviously it's the second to last. Enjoy!**

* * *

It had been a long day at work for Nick, certainly not what he'd expected when he woke up that morning. He never imagined that he'd meet Yvonne's mum, only for her to die a few hours later. It was so surreal.

Nick walked through the door to his flat where he saw Zoe in the kitchen. He walked up behind her and placed his arms around her waist.

"Where's Alex?" He asked.

"Asleep."

"Good." Nick rested his head on Zoe's shoulder and stood in silence for a few seconds taking in her smell, before continuing. "Thank you."

"What for?" Zoe moved and turned around so she was facing him.

"Being you." He smiled and pulled her in for a kiss. "Mm, what's for dinner?" He asked pulling away.

"Trust you to be thinking about your stomach." Zoe said smirking. "Well, you know what a great cook I am. I thought I'd show off my true culinary skills and chucked a pizza in the oven. Hope that's okay for you."

"Perfect. Come sit with me." Nick said grabbing Zoe's hand and walking her over to the sofa. He sat down and Zoe cuddled up next to him.

"What's all this about?" Zoe asked slightly taken aback by Nick's mood.

"I just want to spend some time with you. Alex is asleep, there's no work to worry about." He kissed the top of her head. "I thought we could just talk."

"Oh yeah, what about?" Zoe asked lifting her head slightly to face him.

"Things." He said with a grin on his face. "The future."

"Oh, here we go. The house, the couple of kids…"

"No, no, no. Nothing like that." Nick sighed. "There's just something that I've been thinking about. About Alex. I just… I just.."

"You're just worried that I'm not going to love him because I'm not his mum, aren't you?"

"Well… yeah." Nick admitted.

"Look, just because I'm not his mum it doesn't mean I can't love him." Zoe paused for a while. "Realistically, I'm probably never going to be able to give you another child. Alex is the closest thing I will ever have to having a kid. I'm not trying to replace Yvonne. I'd never want to do that. But Alex is still going to want a mother figure in his life and I'll be there for him."

Nick smiled at Zoe. He loved having the re-assurance that Zoe would be there for Alex without trying to replace Yvonne.

"Just what I wanted to hear." Nick looked at Zoe still with seriousness in his face. "There is something else I want to talk to you about and well… I don't know how to put it really."

"Spit it out Jordan." Zoe said playfully.

"This is serious. Like really serious." He took a deep breath before starting again. "I think we should get out of here."

"What?!" Zoe asked shocked.

"I know it's a big ask. Asking you to leave your job and your friends. It's just, I've been offered a surgeons job in Brighton. It will be a fresh start for us. There's too many bad memories in Holby…" Nick looked at the floor thinking about the past few years. It certainly hadn't been an easy ride.

"I… I don't know Nick." Zoe said still taking in what Nick had just asked her to do.

"I fully understand if you want to stay here and I'll stay with you if that's what you want. I just need to know" He looked into her eyes. "I need to put a deposit on our new house."

"Yes Nick." Zoe said. "Yes. Let's do this. This is the fresh start that we both could do with."

"You really want to do it?" Nick asked happily. "I mean I didn't need a decision that quick."

"I want to do this." Zoe said excitedly. "You, Me, Alex together on the coast. It will be perfect. I love you so much Nick Jordan."

Zoe pulled Nick towards her and the pair of them kissed passionately. They were both in their own world together when suddenly the smell of burning came from the kitchen.

"Erm Zoe…" Nick said pulling away. "Your pizza…"

* * *

**I wish this would really happen... Wishful thinking...**


	15. Chapter 15

**Here is the last chapter. All I can really say is I've loved writing this. I was super nervous at first but everyone's been so kind with reviews it made me want to carry on. So thank you all for that.**

**This chapter's longer than most of my others and it was also a lot harder to write. It brought a little tear to my eye but maybe I'm just a bit emotional regarding the spoilers about Nick that were confirmed today. Either way this was the ending I'd always planned. I hope you enjoy this part and I hope you've enjoyed reading the whole story.**

**Thank you all so much! **

* * *

The day was finally over. Nick and Zoe's last day working at Holby City Hospital. It was a strange day. Nick had been spending time with the new clinical lead, Max. Whilst Zoe spent the day in resus. The atmosphere in the hospital was strange. Everyone knew that two of the best doctors who worked there were leaving.

Nick was sat in his office finishing the final bits on his computer. He wasn't really concentrating. Whilst he was leaving Holby due to the bad memories he couldn't deny there were so many good memories.

"Knock knock." Zoe said as she barged in Nick's office with Alex in his carrier on one arm and with a suit on the other.

"What the…" Nick said getting up and taking Alex.

"I should have said earlier…" Zoe started.

"Said what?" Nick asked suspiciously.

"Well… I know you didn't want a fuss but you can't tell Charlie that." She hung the suit up on the coat hook. "He wants us all in the pub at eight. Just to say goodbye."

"I should have known. I still can't believe we're doing this." Nick said looking around the office. Most of his possessions were now packed up in boxes. "I can't believe we're leaving this place for good." Nick looked over at Zoe with a tiny bit of sadness in his eyes.

"Aww. Is Nick Jordan getting emotional in his old age?" Zoe said sarcastically walking over to him and kissing him.

"Never." Nick whispered in her ear. "Right, take the boy whilst I get changed quickly." He said handing Alex back over to her. Nick started taking his clothes off as Zoe just stood watching. "Stop starring, you." he said playfully.

"It's nothing I haven't seen before." Zoe giggled.

"Yeah alright…" Nick said finishing up. "Are we ready to go then?"

"I guess so." Zoe said. "What about all your stuff?"

"Dr Kent owes me a favour. He'll shove it in the car later."

"Okay then… Let's get going." Zoe walked over and opened the door.

"Yeah, let's go…" Nick said taking a final look at his office. He looked down at Alex who he had on his hip. "One day you'll have an office like this. And one day you'll have to leave this office and you'll find it hard to leave."

Zoe smiled to herself. It was sweet how Nick was getting emotional about leaving his office. To her it's just a room in a hospital but to Nick it meant a lot.

"Come on." Zoe held Nick's hand and led him out.

* * *

The pair of them walked hand in hand to the pub across the road. They had no intention of staying late as they still had packing to do and Alex would need to get to bed.

They stood outside the door of the pub hand in hand for a few seconds. Neither wanting to go in. Nick and Zoe both knew this was going to be emotional. Saying goodbye to friends old and new is never easy.

"Here goes…" Nick said taking a deep breath and leading the way in, Zoe following.

"NICK AND ZOE!" Everyone in the pub shouted in unison as they all stood up and walked over to greet them. Zoe started to tear up but managed to contain herself.

"What are you to having?" Charlie shouted from the bar. "The usual?"

Nick nodded and walked over to him whilst Zoe took Alex went off and sat down with the others.

"You sure know how to put on a good party old boy." Nick said to Charlie. "You didn't have to do this."

"I did." Charlie said firmly. "You are the best clinical lead this hospital has ever seen. And although we haven't always seen eye to eye in the past you are one of the best friends I'll ever have. I see people leave this place all the time. But with you, it's harder to say goodbye. Come here."

Charlie put out his arms for Nick to hug him. Despite Nick not normally being into the hugging thing, he hugged his best mate. He was going to miss Charlie and all his wisdom.

"Now there's bromance!" Linda said from the table causing Charlie and Nick to quickly separate. They walked over to the table with the drinks and sat down.

"So when are you going to do a speech?" Noel asked keenly.

"I'm not doing a speech." Nick said. "I only do them when I'm bossing you lot about."

"SPEECH! SPEECH! SPEECH!" Everyone chanted together.

"Alright, okay." Nick gave in. He stood up. "Well, like I said I don't do speeches but seeing as this is the last time I'll be here I should. I just want to thank everyone. Thank everyone for being a great team, both to work with and to be friends with. I've been through a lot in my few years here. Some things bad, some good. And I think if it wasn't for you lot… well I don't know what I would have done. Zoe and I, we're only moving to Brighton so there's no excuse for you lot not to come down and visit. You're always welcome." A tear fell down Nick's face as he started to get emotional. He'd left places before, including Holby, but this time it felt different.

"Mr Jordan, are you crying?" A slightly drunk Linda asked.

"Yeah, yeah I'm crying." Nick admitted sitting back down. "It's the age."

He smiled as the rest of the team had a laugh.

* * *

After a couple of hours of drinking and reminiscing about times in the ED, Zoe and Nick made their excuses and left. They wanted to slip away quietly and by leaving early they'd achieved that.

Outside Nick looked up at the ED holding Alex. He watched as an ambulance pulled up and Jeff and Dixie jumped out.

"Have fun in Brighton Mr J!" Dixie shouted over.

"See ya around mate." Jeff shouted as he rushed a patient in with Dixie.

Nick turned to Zoe.

"This is it." He sighed. "This is really it."

"Sure is tiger." Zoe said taking his free hand. "Now let's get home. It's freezing out here."

The pair of them walked hand in hand into Nick's car before driving off for their new life.

* * *

**:') Brings a tear to my eye.**

**If I was a scriptwriter at Casualty I would so make this happen. But I'm not. Sorry. :/**


End file.
